Wednesday, June 13, 2012
I spent a lot of years trying to "figure" things out. The crazy part is that I knew exactly what I should have been doing, but somehow my mind would not allow me to do them. I would hold grudges, worry myself half to death about the most minuscule thing, and I was very selfish. I've moved into a place now that has me less worried, loving, and unselfish. The weird thing is that I haven't learned anything any different. The word of God that I have been reading for years and years has remained the same. The sermons that I listen to, all the same.Circumstances in my life, they all are pretty much the same. My kids didn't leave, my husband didn't leave, and people around me haven't changed. The thing that has changed is me. I have decided to not live in fear and not allow myself to fall victim to negativity. It's called peace. It's call surrendering everything to the Savior and allowing him to lead your life.
How do you get there? As my husband used to tell me, "Nike". You just do it. There is no formula. No amount of good deeds will get you to peace. You have to truly want it. You have to truly become sick of yourself and have a desire for God's will to be done in your life. Until then, you'll stew in your mess which in turn prolongs the time you arrive at peace. "Stewing" creates more problems which makes it harder to move forward. The decision is yours stew or move.